So today I hae been doing some thinking, and I hae figured out that I essenially do not know who I am. I realize this may be said or thought by many people but as many times as I have come to this situatiation, I think this time may be different.
What am I looking to get out of life? How can I just turn it into video game principles and "win" before I run out of time?
I have lived in a series of If then statements saying "If this happens, then I will do this" but i am finding I should just let that whole idea go, but it is hard to let that go. making decisions and being proactive on certain issues will make me at fault for any further mistakes. I will not be able to say, "well I only did this because of this," i will be in complete control wich will be very scary.
My paranoia is starting to get the best of me i guess. Or am I just giving up and not being willing to think things through and fight for the perfect ending I am looking for? Its so hard to know when to give up or to keep on fighting.
Soo many questions....
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